Thursday, January 26, 2012

Fashion Vs. Uniform

First thing that I was excited to experience when I graduated from my high school was, the fact that I didn't have to wear any uniform to go to campus. I was kind of sick using the same style of uniform everyday. White shirt, grey skirt and black shoes everyday. No exception. It's pretty boring.

Why do I hate uniform? You can say, well, I do love fashion. And fashion has so many kind of color, style, cut, you name it. That is why I hate wearing the same kind of outfit everyday. I even decided to not to have a job that oblige me to wear any kind of uniform-ish clothes. But in fact, I'm not that fashionable! Even if I was so happy for getting out of my 12 years life in a duty for wearing uniform to go to school, you could find me back then when I was a college-student, wearing the similar outfit everyday!

This is me when I was in college. Yeah, it's sort of uniform-ish outfit.
My mom used to buy me like millions of plaid shirts. Kind of silly, no? Uhm I don't know but well I like plaids. Even now I still love it. Plaid shirt is like grunge thing that reminds me about Kurt Cobain (I don't know much about his music but I think he's cool). Also, I love shirts. Seriously.

And guess what, for now I am here, during my job training, I have a duty to wear a white shirt plus dark-blue trousers, along with dark tie and veil. Everyday! You're right. It's uniform again! Tsk...I think I should make up my mind for not too much complaining about this uniform thing. Come to think about it. Wearing uniform is not that bad. It shows our loyalty and unity regarding being in the same company as employees. So I think I must stop minding this thing.

*By the way, I post a lot of complaining thing in my blog recently. Woops I shall stop doing this. Complaining isn't a good habit, I think.

What do you guys wear to your office or school? Tell me about it. :)

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Jet Lag (Homesick)

Have you ever felt like, you've just suddenly woke up in a wrong place, wrong time, and of course, in a wrong situation? (I didn't mention about a wrong body, no?) Well sometimes I do. Especially in the mean time. It's just like, yesterday I was only a free-lancer and I did so many illustrating and translating stuffs for a living. But now it's totally different. I'm no longer a free-lancer and I'm not able to do anything that I used to do. It's quite hard for me to find some time to make drawings or laying in my bed, do nothing but day-dreaming. Okay, I was a lazy-bone lady back then. And now I'm forced to do a lot of diligent and well-regulated stuffs like having meals in the exact same time everyday, do some sports (THIS IS the worst part) three times a week, studying like crazy especially when it comes to exam-schedule..etc.

So it's like a jet-lag thing. I came from a lazy-bone home and arrived unconsciously in a hard-worker dormitory. And you know, my mates here are those so-called extraordinary people. I wouldn't say this if I have no proof. They are so capable and enthusiastic in everything. I honestly feel a little miss-fitted. Am I really suitable for this kind of job? Will I really capable to do what I'm going to have to do? Will I survived this situation safely? I'll get the answer one year later.

Okay what I am going to say is this, I miss my mom. I miss my cats, my family, my grandma, my home, and my home town! I miss everything in my old life. Well I didn't say that I hate my current life - I actually have been waiting for this phase to come - but sometimes I just feel that something might been wrong. It's like, the time doesn't move in the same rhyme with my own movement. It's like I'm going to miss a lot of things. When I realized that I'm no longer be able to go home again, in the mean time, it's already too late! I was like, hey really?! What am I going to do here, far from my old-times?

So this is what they called as homesick. Or in my case, old-life-sick.

My mom is my everything. Knowing she's not going to be around is a big LOSS.
What I'm able to do right now is just to adapt more. Struggle more. And don't settle. Never settled. Because I believe whatever may come in my life, it has been decided not only by our self in the past, but also by Allah. He's the one who decided what's good or what's bad. Not that I'm not happy or something like that. But I need a little more trigger to make me feel that this is the one that I really must do for a living. Today I may feel like miss-fitted and jet-lagged and tired but well, someday I'll realize that this is the best I can do and I have to do it with ikhlas.

But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah Knows, while you know not.


(Surah Al Baqoroh verse 216)

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Cikole Story part 2

Day 3

Berbivak. Pertama denger "bahasa" itu aku bengong 5 menit. Apaan tuh berbivak? Ternyata berbivak itu nama lain dari berkemah. Dan bivak itu nama lain dari tenda! Olala..kalo berkemah sih dari SD aku suka, kan aku anak Pramuka sampai SMP (dan berhenti gara-gara selalu jadi "penjuru kiri". You know what I mean. -_-). Tapi tunggu dulu..berbivak di Cikole ini beda loh. Yang jelas kita gak dibikinin tenda atau dimasakkin jadi tinggal tidur aja, tapi semuanya kita bikin sendiri! Luar biasa..
Perjalanan menuju tempat berbivak ditempuh dengan jalan kaki per peleton (aku peleton 3, totalnya ada 3 peleton). Kurang jelas juga di mana tempat bivaknya, tapi pelatihnya bilang sih sekitar 15 KM dari dodik. Awalnya aku mikir, alah kecil..kan barengan jadi gak kan kerasa capek. TAPI.... kan semuanya bawa ransel ijo-berat-susah-diatur itu tuh, aku baru nyeberang dodik aja udah ngos-ngosan dan beneran deh, CAPE banget! Aku mikir apa gara-gara kemarinnya aku abis di-orientasi medan ya? Apa karena aku baru ya? Atau emang aku lemah maksimum ya? Yah..wallohu'alam lah yang pasti saat itu, saat yang lain nyanyi-nyanyi ngusir cape, aku malah dipapah sepanjang jalan. Padahal ransel ijo-berat-susah-diatur itu udah ada yang ngebawain (aku lupa siapa, tapi makasih dari hati yang terdalam, mas!) dan bahkan togel-ku dibawain juga. Malu banget ya Alloh...padahal sama teman-teman se-peleton itu aja aku belum kenal semua tapi udah merepotkan semua (mulai galau).

Dan tau gak apa yang benar-benar mengganggu selama perjalanan itu? Yup. SEPATU. Sering banget aku jatuh kesandung dan berpikir bahwa, "Come on! aku tidak dilahirkan untuk memakai sepatu seperti ini!" (lebay). Karena beneran sih, kaki di dalam sepatu itu jadinya licin banget. Mungkin karena umur sepatunya baru 3 hari kali ya, sementara umur sepatu orang lain udah 13 hari, dan sepatuku itu jarang disemir pula, jadinya si sepatu ini masih gak betah nempel di kakiku. Saking betenya sama sepatu ini nih, aku sempat bilang pelatih pengen ganti sendal jepit! Hahay malu banget kalau inget kejadian ini. Ya daripada ngerepotin terus yang lain? Untungnya, teman kelompokku pada sabar-sabar dan gak nunjukkin kedongkolan mereka gara-gara keleletanku itu. Terima kasih peleton-ku..jasa-jasamu akan kukenang selalu.

Singkat cerita, setelah perjalanan yang melelahkan dan hampir aja aku mau pengsan (ini serius) tiap 5 meteran, sampe juga di tempat kemah. Kontan aku disindirin pelatihnya ampe gak kehitung lah berapa kali. Aku dibilang "ele-ele-an" masa... Sempet bikin down juga tuh, tapi ketika aku mengingat bahwa denda 300 juta bakal jadi bebanku kalau berhenti di sini, akhirnya aku paksain juga. (sampai hari ke-tiga ini, motivasi-ku masih "takut-didenda-tiga-ratus-juta-jadi-jangan-berhenti-dulu").
Tempat kemahnya itu subhanalloh indah banget...dari dulu aku penggemar berat hutan konifer (hutan pinus, cemara, dsb.). Kalau mau tau, Cikole itu daerah yang deketan dengan Gunung Tangkuban Perahu loh.. Nah nyampe sana, kita langsung disuruh nyiapin tenda (bikin sendiri) dan masak buat makan malem. Kebetulan aku se-bivak sama teh D dan R, dan mereka jago bikin tenda. Aku sendiri karena susulan jadi gak tau apa-apa soal cara bikin tenda. Akhirnya aku ditugaskan untuk ME-MA-SAK.

Alat masaknya itu, kompor kecil portable yang cuma bisa dikasih bahan bakar berupa parafin alias lilin atau kayu bakar ukuran mini. Dan koreknya itu loh. Geretan! Sumpah sebenernya aku takut nyalain api di geretan..tapi karena waktu itu gengsi mengakuinya, yaudah aku sok-sokan bisa aja padahal parafinnya gak kebakar-kebakar gitu. Parahnya, pelatih di deket aku ada yang curiga kenapa parafin aku gak nyala-nyala. Terus dia bilang "e kamu takut korek ya?" Mati gue. Hadeh pelatih, aku gak takut korek loh, itu parafin gak nyala-nyala karena aku masih berkutat dengan "bagaimana menyalakan geretan dengan benar tanpa membakar jempol tangan". Beuh...

Fakta menarik dari berbivak ini, saat memasak, hampir semua tukang masak tiap bivak menghasilkan masakan yang sama: nasi kurang mateng karena parafinnya abis di tengah jalan. Hore...aku tidak sendiri! Hehehe. Pokoknya makanan pertama di hari itu (kebetulan sudah sore) adalah nasi kurang mateng campur mie instan. Okelah,,hampir tiap hari sih kita makan nasi kurang mateng. Lauknya itu sangat variatif, bisa sarden, mie instan, abon, mie instan, dan abon (tuh kan variatif?).

Tiap sore jam setengah 6 dan pagi jam setengah 6, kita wajib tiarap di depan bivak. Masalahnya gak semua bivak menghadap pohon! Akhirnya pada waktunya tiarap itu, kita pada rebutan pohon deh. Nah terus setiap malam mulai jam 10-an, ada jaga serambi alias jaga malem bergiliran. Tiap bivak dapet giliran satu jam dan kita dikasih sandi suara dan sandi cahaya untuk berjaga-jaga dari musuh. Sebenernya tiap jam pasti ada pelatih yang mantau bivak kita sih tapi kan tetep aja kita harus jaga serambi sendiri supaya tetap waspada (dari bom). Saking waspadanya, mau tidur kek, mau ngapain kek, kita gak pernah buka sepatu! Udah kayak orang Eropa sono jadinya..hoho

Semua kejadian hari itu bikin aku mikir. Bahwa segala hal yang dilakukan dengan hati dongkol tidak akan mendatangkan manfaat apa-apa. Oke taro lah bahwa hal yang dilakukan memang sebenernya gak bermanfaat. Tapi minimal, kalau tidak dongkol, ya masih bisa dinikmati sebagai pengganjal waktu lah. Dan satu lagi, sebenci apapun kamu dengan sepatu (tentara)mu, jangan sampai kau telantarkan apalagi lupa disemir. Karena dia akan menggigit kakimu. Ini nyata kawan!
to be continued...

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Cikole Story part 1

So.. I decided to make this "Cikole" special edition in Bahasa Indonesia. The reason is just simple, because it'll be much emotional and I don't think I could make it right in English. As a hint, I tell you that I had a military training starting in December 16 until 31, 2011. It's a part of my job training. Well if you don't understand the post, feel free to use the Google Translator toolbar at the right column or you can just stare at the pictures. It'll be more understandable. Let me begin then!

Day 1

Jadi gini ceritanya, kan aku pernah bilang ya kalau aku sudah mulai training kerja di salah satu BUMN di Indonesia. Nah ternyata di antara sekian banyak tahapan training itu, ada wamil-nya! (baca: wajib militer, bahasa halus: kewiraan). Jujur aku sebagai orang yang payah dalam berolahraga dan sebenernya paling males dengan segala hal berbau ospek plus bentak-bentakan, tentu aja mengalami parno yang luar biasa. Tapi kan mau gimana lagi soalnya wajib sih..kalo gak ikutan nanti aku gak bisa lanjut training. hehe.

Langsung aja ke inti ceritanya. Aku sudah pernah bahas tentang seluk-beluk rekrutmen yang cukup ribet bin rempong di sini dan di sini. Intinya, aku ikut kewiraan susulan, jadi pas orang lain udah ikut kewiraan sekitar 10 hari, aku dan 4 orang lainnya malah baru ikutan. Sindrom murid baru.

Hari pertama adalah hari ter-horror dalam kehidupan wamil-ku. Terang aja horror, bayangin pas mau turun dari mobil jemputan eh tiba-tiba ada beberapa orang pake seragam tentara bentak-bentak kita terus nyuruh baris, jalan jongkok, merayap dsb., diiringi SUARA tembakan! Bayangin ya, TEMBAKAN senapan nih! Jujur aku paling benci banget sama segala sesuatu yang bikin kaget. Balon pecah aja aku benci banget apalagi senapan. Tapi karena gak ada pilihan lain, aku manut aja.

Sepanjang jalan merayap dan jalan jongkok yang diiringi tembakan plus pertanyaan-pertanyaan kayak "kalian nyesel? kalian dongkol? Pulang sana!" dan sebagainya, kita terjatuh-jatuh di jalan bebatuan sampe lutut kita bonyok-bonyok. Malem-malem pula. Mata ditutup pula. Weks. Tapi seperti aku bilang tadi, biar dongkol juga gak mungkin kita ngaku. Toh selama wamil itu kita kan ada di genggaman tangan mereka.

Balik lagi ke cerita tadi. Nah pas nyampe ke suatu tempat dengan bau menyan menyengat, tau-tau aja kita disuruh buka penutup mata. Eh jujur ya sebenernya mata aku gak ketutup-ketutup amat, tapi gara-gara sedikit acting, pelatihnya gak tau kalau gw ngintip. wehehe. Nah pas penutup mata dibuka, meski ngintip aku tetep kan gak tau itu tempat apa. Pertamanya sih kirain kuburan. Ternyata eh ternyata, di depan kita tau2 ada kolam dengan air ijo banget dan suara kodok bersahutan. Sepertinya ada ratusan kodok di sana. Kita jadi was-was. Apakah kita akan disuruh nyebur??

Tapi taunya gak gitu juga. Kita cuma disuruh ngambil "nama suci" yang letaknya di tengah-tengah kolam dan apapun yang terjadi, kita gak boleh kena basah. Ribet kan! Akhirnya, karena aku dan V lagi pada pake jaket tebel, kepaksa jaket kita dikorbanin dan dipake buat jaring untuk ngambil si "nama suci" itu dari kresek di tengah kolam. Buset dah jaket aku jadi korban. (udah mulai dongkol). Nah di situ aku kebagian nama suci "kobelco". Waktu itu sih gak tau artinya apaan, tapi belakangan aku baru tahu kalau Kobelco itu salah satu merek kendaraan berat. Gak cocok banget ama perawakan gue. Wkwk

Oke jadi selanjutnya setelah pengambilan nama suci itu, aku sama 4 orang susulan lainnya (V, D, mas F n I anak keuangan - nama disamarkan), digiring ke sebuah ruang kelas. Mata kita waktu itu ditutup jadi pas buka mata, surprise banget ternyata kita udah dikelilingi sama senior-senior (dibilang senior karena mereka udah wamil duluan, sampe 10 hari) dan dikasih yell-yell gitu. Jadi ikutan semangat deh.

Terus setelah mereka ke luar kelas, kita digiring ke sebuah beranda. Di situ udah ada ransel berisi macem-macem barang seperti baju olahraga, alat mandi, gelas+piring-sendok, handuk, dan dua setel baju hijau yang aku gak ngerti gimana cara pakenya. Tapi tau-tau langsung disuruh pake baju itu dengan segala embel-embelnya. Dan tau gak, aku dikasih sepatu militer dengan ukuran 37! (ukuran sepatuku 36). Kedengarannya simple tapi trust me deh, sepatu itu luar biasa berat dan keras, maklum terbuat dari kulit. Dan kegedeannya itu loh. Cape deh.. Ohiya ternyata kita berlima gak dikasih kamar atau barak, kita malah dikasih tenda kecil. Putri dan putra dipisah. Tidurnya di luar dan lengkap pake segala macem atribut baju ijo itu. Luar biasa dah pokoknya.
This is me! Can you believe it?

Singkat cerita, kita tidur di bivak tsb. Malam berlalu dengan tenang, dengan sepatu kebesaranku (literally kebesaran).

Day 2

Jam 4 subuh keesokan harinya, tiba-tiba aja ada suara menggelegar. Suara BOM! Sama senapan bersahutan. Sekejap aku langsung lupa ketakutanku sama senapan dan bom sehingga akhirnya langsung aja kami ke luar bivak dan tiarap di deket pohon terdekat. Gak tau deh maksudnya apaan cuma dari semalem emang udah diperingatkan bahwa kalo denger suara bom tuh kita harus cepet-cepet tiarap di deket pohon terdekat. Satu orang satu pohon lagi. Repot asli. Beberapa menit setelah itu langsung aja kita dikumpulin di lapangan, cek kelengkapan. Pas ketahuan ada yang lupa pake topi lah, apa lah, langsung dihukum push up sama jalan jongkok. Ngeriiiii.

Siangnya saat yang lain belajar kompas, kita berlima ikutan orientasi medan. Di orientasi ini kita dikasih pelatih sebagai komandan yang bawa bendera merah, terus dia kibar-kibarin benderanya dengan isyarat tertentu. Kalau benderanya diarahin ke atas, kita lari. Kalo ke bawah, kita jalan jongkok. Kalo ke bawah banget? Kita merayap. Mantabs dah. Orientasinya berlangsung di daerah sekitar dodik tempat kami latihan. Deket sih cuma medannya bener-bener yang berbatu-batu, ada lumpur, sungai, rumput alang-alang, dan benda-benda hutan lainnya.

Sepanjang jalan aku beneran kecapekan, udah gitu semalem pas baru dateng aku kan jatoh tuh, lutut aku dua-duanya sakit. Masya Allah dah. Lebam biru-biru banyak banget. Jadinya pas di jalan itu aku dituntun mas F, gantian sama V. Si I lututnya juga sakit. Belakangan aku baru tau kalo lutut mas F malah sobek! Lebih parah dari aku dan harus dijahit. Padahal dia masih bisa jalan dan bantuin aku. Aku cuma lebam doank udah lelet-manja-najis gini. Parah kan! Gara-gara itu aku dimarahin pelatih Muji. Masa dia bilang, "kamu harus lebih serius ya!".  Meh! Ini juga serius pelatih, cuma akunya aja masih lemah. Hohoho.

day 1 and day 2

*Selanjutnya bersambung dulu ya, mau mengingat-ngingat dulu jalan ceritanya. Maklum sekarang tiap hari pematerian training padet banget, curi-curi waktunya susah. Foto-fotonya akan terus di-update, lagi di-edit dulu. Hehe.

Tell me your opinions. It's an exciting moment in my life, btw.


To be continued...

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Officially Twenty Two

Last 2 days was my 22nd birthday. Never thought that it'll be announced by our class leader in our very class room! So ashamed.. But never mind, I'm still acquaintance to almost everyone in here (read: my work place).

Well like I once said, I used to make a little review about my past year and my expectations about my future year. I reviewed my progress on my way to pursue my dream and try to guess what was threaten me in the past year and I was like, will I survive this year? Am I getting closer to my dream? Will I find anything that I've been searching for? etc.

My introspection+resolution for my 22nd birthday. The image was taken by my friend's blackberry and it's blurry. Pardon this!
Orhan Pamuk once said in his White Castle book: "sometimes you're too afraid to inspect your mistakes". And so did it happened. I did a lot of mistakes, sins, su'udzon stuffs, etc and sometimes I have a hard feeling when I have to admit it. But every year I always renew my promise to be getting better and better. I have to raise my faith, raise my husnudzon feeling, more thankful and of course, more confident.

FYI, I write this post while sleepy because my schedule is very tight these days! But it's okay. Thanks to Ibu and Bapak for always there for me, and give me the biggest support ever while everyone look me down. Thanks to my best friends, thanks for your patience to listen to my childish blabs. And thank you so much for your attention, your prayer, and every wishes you sent to me verbally, by texts, twitter or facebook. That means a lot to me. Seriously! And good luck for y'all, too. May 2012 treat you right. Amiin.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

2012: 22 things before 22

Every time I see the last date on the last month of the last page on my calendar, I feel suddenly excited. Not because it's the end of the year or the new year's eve will soon approach. Well I don't like fireworks (it's too noisy for my ears) or stay up in the middle of the night and actually I don't celebrate new year bash or something like that. It's just, new year means I'll soon have my age grew. Cheesy huh? I love new year!

But, making a recap or kaleidoscopic notes about how I've been doing in the past year to make an introspection or even a resolution is a good thing. Beside, it'll be soon my birthday so I used to make that recap. It's very useful to make yourself improved both mentally and emotionally. Okay, I'll do that in detail when my birthday is coming. Now I'd just make a short recap about how I feel about 2011. Say, 2011 for me is all about my effort to enter the company I've been working for. And don't forget about the illustrations. I made illustrations like crazy while that waiting phase.


2011
* Had a typhus in February
* Had a very long process to enter the company
* Hired as a ghost writer, helping my professor's colleague to do his doctoral thesis
* Had a long waiting phase, curious about my previous job application test
* Had a big love for illustrations, at first it was just to distract my mind from that waiting phase
* Had a big passion for blogging, even bigger
* Had my illustration contributed in NYLON magazine
* Had a small pox with a late diagnose (I've forgiven you, doc! Don't worry)
* My lovely cat was dead
* Waiting phase again, not ended yet
* Losing my expectation about the company, started to apply for another job
* Finally hired and have my job training started since December and afterward (I guess I'll make a special edition for this)

See? 2011 is like a very long hiatus for me. But it's okay now because it ended up like a happy ending. I just wish that 2012 will be more kind to me. It has a good beginning, so I wish it'll end in a good ending. FYI, last year, in my hiatus, I always pray,

"Allah, please don't make me face my 22nd birthday with me still a lame unemployed."

And you know IT'S GRANTED! So..relieved. Alhamdulillah.

Anyway, I actually didn't have any list about "22 things before 22" stuff. I guess I'll write a list about 22 things I achieved before 22. But not right now. I'm still thinking about it.


Last but not least, HAPPY NEW YEAR! 2012 please be kind(er) to me. :)