When you don't earn anything that you're excited and overwhelmed about for a long time, you'll get very down.
That's what happened to me today.
That's what happened to me today.
Well it's a simple thing. The day Steve Jobs died, it was announced that his biography will be available by the end of October in Indonesia (of course, it's been translated to our language). As a big fan of him, and also since he's passed away which means the biography became valuable, I was so excited and has tried so many ways to get the book. Like, when it has first announced, I put the book in my wishlist on my online-book-shipper account. It took a day for me to decide whether I have to buy the book or not. Thing is, it's quite expensive but since the book isn't available yet, we have to get the pre-order-ed one, which means cheaper by 20% to the original price. So then the next day I returned to the website, tried to put the book into my cart. Guess what, the book stock ran out. My my, I was so sad at the time.
|Retrieved from bukabuku.
After that, I tried to put the wish-list-ed book to my own cart, despite the notification said it was no longer available. But it worked! Means, I was just ordered it. I was so happy but the notification really drove me confused. Did I really ordered it? What if my order wasn't noted on their list? So I asked the customer service if they had received my order or not. But the email took 2-3 days to be proceed and it got on my nerve so I, without any purpose, CANCELED that order. I changed the amount from 1 to zero. And then I shocked! It was really canceled! I couldn't pre-order the book any more! I also couldn't back to the previous page so the order was officially canceled and I couldn't re-order it since it was still unavailable!
So then I did the next step. I browsed the publisher's official site, just to get to know whether it'd be possible for me to get the pre-order. Unfortunately, there wasn't any pre-order available yet. At the time I thought that I really have to wait a month to get the book. Man..it's too long. But accidentally I found another announcement. They said they would give us 5 free books as giveaways. So I still had the chance, and this time, the chance to get the free one, not only discount-ed. The rule was, you had to make a short statement about how was your feeling about Steve Jobs and his death. Well I had a bunch words to say and it took me a day to decide what statement should I give. Finally I stated about how Steve Jobs changed my mind about the choice of being a scientist and artist at the same time. I used to think that you have to choose one in order to success. Nobody could walk both of the path, there's always choice to choose. But Steve Jobs once stated that we could live the path, both of them. Yeah, I felt like it was the best words to say because nobody would talk about that. So far, I saw them stated about sadness, contribution, and anything like that. I won't put the statement here because I still felt down. You're right, I didn't win. I was too optimistic. I joined the competition like 4 days ago and today is the announcement. I opened the website like, every hour and the last time I checked, I learn that I didn't win!
Well, the last time I checked the book-shipper, it's said that now you're able to pre-order the book due the end of the month. Yeah, it's available again now. You know what, I'm no longer too overwhelmed about the chance to get the book (okay, I'm not honest about this). I'm just tired. Maybe this isn't my luck. Maybe I have to save the luck for my other commission, or competition, or even my carrier. You know my friend once told me this, if you put yourself too much into the luck-dependent things, like game or competition or gambling, someday you'll lost all of your luck stock. I don't even know if luck has stocks, or whether it has limit or not, but I think that Luck can be found, or created everywhere. You don't have to cry about one unfortunate event because there's always another chance. You've done enough and you've got to move on, think about another possibility. Just like Steve Jobs said, "don't settle".
Anywaaaaay......enough with the sad story. I've been busy lately to do another illustration (or you can say commission), the picture of my biochemistry-laboratory colleagues. We didn't have time to do the photo-shoot so I've just collected their photos (mostly from their facebook pages) and sketched it one by one. The concept is, I will put the sketch along with their actual photos held on their hands. Right now I'm still working with it, and the progress is below.
|I made it on tracing papers so it looks transparent.
Well, wish you a good day today and stop being so depressed just because a small thing. :)